who are you
Gatineau,
Quebec,
Canada

??
You currently hold my curiosity.

Im in the strangest place today.

I almost feel like Im drifting away.
The wind is taking me.
Begging to keep me.

I might give in. today.

I need to ride my bike more &

I think
I think
I think

I think I might quit smoking weed.

hmm.

Most days I don't feel like making new friends.
But lately I have had an itch.
It could be the weather.

It must be the weather.
I'm dying and cutting my fucking hair.


fuckkkkkk

Today was odd.
Today was great.

I got one of my gorgeous plugs in tonight.
& I adore every single one of my coworkers, who are right there knocking sense into me.

time

"True love is timeless."



lies. lies. lies.
& a few more lies.



Maybe I don't know what love is,
maybe love is something I've simply imagined.
something I cant describe.
Yet like all American, when I'm told to want something
I want it.
I'm told to desire it.
So I desire it.

Maybe it is something I've just made up,
a word I've forced myself to feel.
Or maybe it is just a word,
that I have been trying to force meaning to.


The best feelings are the ones words cant define.

thanks old man in front of my coffee shop

"cigarettes
&
wine
&
heavy metal
every night
you could die
by 35"

I went to the Down Town Showdown in Long Beach this Saturday.

In the alleycat race.
I swore to myself I should have trained for it,
& I should have. I was right behind the first girl when I got to the stage.
2nd by a few seconds.

and in GoldSprints,

fucking 3rd by a mila. second.
(I think my "mila" is not spelled correctly.)


bahhhh



It was a pretty good day though

:)

bllurr

Sometimes I wonder if this is all really happening.
If the words you say or the gestures you make
are actually reality and not all the thoughts wondering though my head.

But just like in my dreams I sit there awkwardly.
Wondering, "Is this happening?"
Waiting for a something.

Now here I am, wide awake.
Defiantly not dreaming.


& I don't know what to do.
And I don't know the difference between what I imagined and what is happening..
I don't know if it just happened in a dream.

Everything is blurring.

I'm slowly becoming happy.

Everything somehow makes no sense anymore again.

please

PINCH

ME.

all my dreams and reality's are colliding.

it's funny what one simple idea can lead you too.

"Learn from your fucking mistakes, God damn it."

I'm not so Innocent anymore.

To be honest, I do not trust a single soul.
I can't even recall what trust feels like anymore.


I have learned to trust no one.
So no one I will trust.


Until it feels like my efforts wont all be at lost.

Lately, well always, BUT especially lately,
my thoughts have been showing me how spot on me instincts are.

My first thought,
My very first sentence to myself about something,
the thought that I really don't think much of or think about,
is right.
every time, this past couple days.

about the most random oddest things.


Does this mean Im right about the things that make me doubt myself?


Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.