I am alone.
Sitting in the feathers of my memories, wondering, "where the fuck, did I go wrong this time?"
I haven't moved much emotionally. I haven't moved much physically. I'm not numb anymore, and for the record, I'm currently sad. Not miserable, not depressed, just sad.

"Love is an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired."

Honestly I just miss having that someone else in my life who can pick me apart. Who I can pick apart. Someone who I cant get enough of, who cant get enough of me. I miss the rush when your eyes simply just make contact, the way one touch makes your heart pound. I have so many feelings, so much passion. I can be such a loving and kind person, but I just want to feel that feeling back. Yet here I am, alone again with this stench of wrongness in the air.

I have been here, I have been here before. This exact feeling. How am I here again, how is this possible? I did everything to avoid this feeling, but like a shadow it is here again. I need to stop trying so hard, everything seems to work out, when I'm not trying.

I do not know where to go.
I am only surrounded by darkness.